Tag Archives: punny

Children make terrible pets (and I make terrible puns)

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While visiting my in-laws last weekend, I accompanied my sister-in-law on an errand to the teacher supply store. (It was my very own Journey to the Center of Educational Worth.) Have you ever been in one of these places? For my readers who teach, I’m sure it’s old hat. For me, it was like peeking behind the curtain in the Emerald City and seeing the real Wizard of Oz.

I’d never really stopped to consider where all of those bulletin board displays, charts, and classroom signs came from. (Magic? Elves?) Now I know – they come from a store that has every school supply you can imagine, as well as hundreds that you cannot. Continue reading →

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The right way to ask people when they plan to have kids

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Okay, students. Professor Judge E. Dog is back today with another useful lesson. You may have friends or family members who seem stubbornly unwilling to shout their reproductive plans from the rooftops. When interrogated asked, they give “cute” answers such as “When we’re ready, we’ll let you know” or “I just want more puppies.”

I’m going to let you in on a little secret. There are countless articles out there advising people how to evade your questions and hide this important information. These devious masterminds have a host of skillful dodges at their disposal. What’s a Nosy Parker to do? It’s just not fair. You’re just embracing your inner Mary Worth. Where are the tips about the right way to ask this question? (Here. Those tips are here.) Continue reading →

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Live every week like it’s Bark Week

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Listen sharks, I know this is your week, but I just want to say that Bark Week would be the best animal-themed week of all time. (Just to clarify, I’m talking about dogs here, not this kind of bark.)  Get on that, television executives.

  1. First up, your punny pet names: Shark Cuban and Finjamin Bratt.
  2. Has Shark Week jumped the shark? I’m just sayin’.

    via giphy.com

  3. Anyway, the angry starfish is my favorite thing about these Shark Week cookies.
  4. Are you a Shark Week fan? I hope that you’re dressing the part.
  5. You better look good for that Shark Week party. After all, there ain’t no party like a Shark Week party. That’s the word on the (underwater) street, anyway.
  6. Dogs dressed as sharks? ?
  7. You might have already seen Shark Cat by now. (Shark Cat is clearly more polished than Shark Dog.) If not, here’s a taste.
  8. In the battle of Sharknado versus Teddy Roosevelt, we all win. (As the man himself once said, “Walk softly and carry a big shark.”)
  9. Forget Sharknado. (But never forget Catnado.)  Who is making a Deerecho movie? Or Tsunameerkat? (Alternatively, let’s just shark up some other movies.)

Finally, it’s time for this week’s video. (Warning: contains plastic doll nudity, graphic doodles, and freeze frame air jumping.)

If you’ve been too busy watching Shark Week to visit the blog lately, here’s what we were up to this week:

Have a great weekend – be safe out there!

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Your Friday cute: Double or puffin?

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I know I’ve been remiss with my weekly link roundups lately, so today’s is packed full of linkage to send you smiling into the weekend…

  1. First up, your punny pet names: Thorin Croakenshield and Bilbo Waggins. (Bonus: Meowly Cyrus and J.R.R. Tolkitten, courtesy of this pun-filled link. I won’t lie – I’m kind of annoyed at myself for not coming up with the latter.)
  2. Speaking of puns, please enjoy the whole enchihuahua!
  3. I want to throw a puppy party. I don’t know what the occasion will be, but the theme will (of course) be puppies. Who’s in?
  4. I have a tendency to declare that something is my spirit animal quite often. Like once a week. Or twice a day. Anyway, I would declare this frog my spirit animal, but I think it would be more appropriate to appoint him my new life coach.
  5. Take note: this is how you make an entrance.
  6. Holy cuteness, Batman! It’s a puffin chick! I wonder what they’ll name her. Perhaps Arianna Puffington? Or Hillary Puff? (Note: I decided to Google “Puffington Post” to see if it such a thing existed, and if so, if it was a blog dedicated to puffins. In case you’re wondering, the answers are: yes… and a resounding NO.  It’s more likely to appeal to hardcore fans of this movie. I naively did not see that coming.)
  7. Speaking of baby puffins, apparently they’re actually known as pufflings. Amazing. (From this same link, I also learned that a group of ferrets is called a business, which may be the coolest name for a group of animals ever. It might even edge out a grumble of pugs. I need to think on it.)

Anyway, putting that important debate aside for a moment (stay tuned), it’s time for this week’s video:

I have the urge to script dialogue for this whole thing. What do puffins talk about?

Finally, in case you missed it, here’s what we were up to on the blog this week:

That’s all for today, folks. Telling me your favorite word for a group of animals or dreaming up some puffin dialogue in the comments is highly encouraged.

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Pup culture confession: I like the dog from Duck Hunt

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It’s time for another Friday link roundup. Today’s theme? Video games.

(Before we get started, however, a quick disclaimer. Looking back, I’m mildly horrified that I played a video game in which the objective was to shoot computerized ducks. However, I do have a certain fondness for that laughing dog. I can’t help it.)

  1. First up, this week’s punny pet name: Carmen Sandi-dog-o.
  2. Speaking of puns, this blog is filled entirely with recipes bearing punny titles of the legal variety. It is therefore amazing. I rest my case.
  3. Puns are not my only love. (Sorry, puns.) Given the format of this and many other posts, you are probably already aware that I love lists. Thus, this post about obsessive list making was a home run for me.
  4. Video games let you live out fantasies. Depending on the game, you can be a warrior, a dinosaur, a pilot, a hedgehog with a dye job, or even a plumber with an overactive imagination. Maybe you can even pretend you’re a dog?
  5. Now that I think about it, perhaps dogs are already living la vida video game.
  6. Apparently there’s a game coming out about a dog in space. (Yes, I’m fighting the urge to make that same dog… in… space joke again.)
  7. Who am I kidding? Will any video game dog ever top this guy?

    via giphy.com

  8. I mean, these cynical hedgehogs know what I’m talking about. Totally skeptical.

Today’s video reminded me of that old Mortal Kombat game. (Or maybe Punch Out, although this video is more akin to a boxing game.) (On a tangentially related note, I now want to start a band and name it Mortal Wombat.) (On a note related to that tangentially-related note, a Google search quickly revealed that I am far from the first person to utter that pun.)

(h/t Cute Overload)

Anyway, here’s what we’ve been up to this week on the blog:

Have anything fun planned this weekend? I’ve got a few things on my to do list, the least exciting of which might involve laundry. Wild and crazy? Check.

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Your Friday cute: Red Panda-monium

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I realize it’s been somewhat quiet on the blog lately. Unlike the inspiration for today’s post, I didn’t make a run for it. I’ve just been a bit tired lately (although my yawns are nowhere near as adorable as these), so I gave myself permission to slack a little.

Enough rest, however… it’s time for some panda-monium, of the red variety:

  1. First up your punny pet names: Panda Sykes and Bamboo Rawls.
  2. Three words: baby red pandas.
  3. Listen buddy, be careful who you call cute and cuddly. Watch your back.
  4. Confession: sometimes I like to just reread this post and pretend that the pandas really are happy to see me.
  5. Work out? Eh, I would be much more likely to go to the gym if my fellow patrons looked like this.
  6. Red pandas are so expressive. They were made for posts like this one.
  7. I’m not sure if it keeps the doctor away, but I hope that an apple a day makes the red panda stay.
  8. I think this red panda might be Bella’s cousin. (And this one might be Tavish’s. As well as this one. Geez.)
  9. This next link has me thinking that I need to expand Tavish’s wardrobe. (Kidding. Sort of. I do think he could rock this look. I also think he might want to disown me if I tried it.)
  10. Couldn’t we all use a red panda hug?

Finally, today’s video is a concentrated dose of pure cuteness:

In case you missed it, here’s what we were up to on the blog this week:

Have a great weekend!

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#K9Kamp: Turn that frown upside down by not sitting around

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Today is the last day of this session of K9 Kamp. It’s been fun, so I thought I’d send it off with an appropriate farewell. That’s right, today’s links are fit to be read…

  1. Up first, your punny pet names: Richard Simbones and Dane Fonda. (Alternatives for that last one: Jane Fawnda or Mane Fonda.)
  2. We did a lot of walking this time around. For the next session of K9 Kamp, I hope to step it up a bit. I’ll be taking a cue from some of my fellow Kampers, who came up with great ways to stay fit. Among them? Hiking, skateboarding, weightlifting, superhero training, kayaking, and geocaching.
  3. It’s not just about working out though. Being healthy involves eating right too, which would be much easier if I had a chef like this one helping me out.
  4. I’m feeling nostalgic for Kamp already. Can’t we have a few more days of campfire songs and s’mores (in appropriately-sized portions, of course)? Time to pull out the photos and reminisce.
  5. Even though Kamp is over for now, there will still be mini-challenges each month courtesy of our newest coach. I can’t wait (and I know my squishy core can still use some more work).
  6. I’d still like to put in a formal request that Koly engage in some (videotaped) Prancercise, with or without a John Mayer soundtrack. (Pretty please? I’ll even try to see if I can figure out how Tavish can do the Flo in return.)
  7. On a tangentially related note, today happens to be Take Your Dog to Work Day. I wonder if you could bring your dog to the office gym. (Probably not.)

Finally, I leave you with today’s video. I’m kind of in love with it – it makes me want to finally learn how to edit a decent video and come up with something amazing for the next session of K9 Kamp.

Even though this session of Kamp has come to an end, you can still enter to win an awesome grand prize package until Tuesday, June 25. Go check it out!

Finally, here’s what we were up to on the blog this week:

Will you be working out with your dog this weekend?

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A fairy tail ending…

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It’s time for your No Frown Friday link roundup – let’s get to it!

  1. First up, your punny pet names: Snow Bite and Finderella (for a fish, of course).
  2. Speaking of puns, this link has superhero dog puns for days. It’s glorious.
  3. Fairy tales are on my mind this week thanks to this wonderful post: Six Fairy Tales for the Modern Woman. (I rarely say this, but even the comments are worth reading. The whole page is full of win.)
  4. What say you, Feminist Taylor Swift? Sounds right up your alley. Sing it, sister.
  5. In other fairy tale-type news, I’m intrigued by this story.
  6. I like my princesses sassy and not focused solely on finding a prince. (Listen closely, Mr. Mouse.) Too many frogs out there anyway, am I right?
  7. If you do find yourself surrounded by frogs, just shake it off. It’ll be okay.

    Shake it off.

    via giphy.com

  8. Anyway… I’m sorry, Dog Mario, but your princess is in another castle. Again. Feel like you’ve made a huge mistake? Perhaps you should just relax on the porch and just let her rescue herself.
  9. Maybe it’s better to be Queen instead. Or maybe it’s more fun to be a villain? Either way, I’m sure that whatever you choose, it’ll be just peachy.

In any event, enjoy your quest. Bonus points if you look this cute while doing it:

Finally, I thought I’d do a quick roundup of what’s been happening on the blog this week. So, in case you missed it:

Have a great weekend!

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Your Friday cute: Animal odd couples

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I realize that No Frown Friday has been missing of late – but it’s back, baby! Let’s get to it.

  1. First up, your punny pet names: Pony Soprano and Duckleberry Finn.
  2. Doug the cat and Charlie the dog could teach us all a thing or two. Citizens of the world, let them guide us to world peace.
  3. I really cannot resist a cat-dog friendship. It’s like catnip. (I couldn’t come up with a dog equivalent… it’s not like there’s some sort of dognip out there.)
  4. Prepare to melt when you read this story about a dog saving a kitten.
  5. Seriously though… perhaps it’s time we rethink that fighting like cats and dogs thing. In some cases, it just means “fighting” in the most adorable way possible.
  6. While we’re changing things up, I suggest we modify Duck, Duck, Goose as well. How about Duck, Duck, Dog?
  7. Up next in the odd couple parade, I present a dog riding a horse.
  8. Considering I cannot actually ride a horse – although I’d love to learn – I’m feeling a bit inadequate right now. Maybe I’ll just snuggle up with a stuffed animal… like this horse and his teddy bear. (Please excuse the rain that has appeared on my face. The teddy bear is his surrogate mama. I can’t even.)
  9. This cat has a stuffed leopard best friend. I am having lots of feelings today.

For today’s video, I thought we’d just overdose on adorable odd couples:

Whew. I hope that this installment of No Frown Friday helps you wag your way into the weekend!

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