As is tradition around these parts, it’s time for the annual unveiling of our holiday card. Continue reading
Tavish Holiday Tip #63
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Category Archives: howlidays
Be whine?
I just couldn’t resist.
Why didn’t I buy heart PJs? Missed opportunity.
Happy Valencanine’s Day from PJ Jazzy Tavish! (That’s totally his rap name. Watch out, Lonely Island. Speaking of which… Michael Bolton is our Valentine, y’all.)
Tavish holiday tip #47
I know I’ve been notably light on the caroldies (and the blogging in general) this year, but I couldn’t let the holidays pass without sharing our traditional holiday tip. So, without further ado…
I’m Tavish S. Penguins!
Tavish Holiday Tip #47
This year, do your own thing. Make reindeer part of it. Any questions?
The best part of this year’s card distribution was the conversation with someone who was unfamiliar with the inspiration for this year’s card. He thanked me for the card, mentioned that it was cute, and asked me what was up with the reindeer.
Best day ever.
Also, I’ve got some plans to get back on the blogging wagon in the new year. Although the comic (which I would very much like you to check out) keeps me busy, I’m going to start posting at least a few times a month here. I miss this space… and you, friends.
Happy holidays!
One-fifth score & Tavish ears ago
Yule thank him later: Tavish Holiday Tip #23
As some of our longtime readers might know, our canine collaborators are in the habit of sharing a holiday tip in our holiday card every year. Accordingly, it’s time to reveal this year’s card… Continue reading
‘Tis the season (for another canine Christmas carol)
Did you really think I would let a holiday season pass by without sending some new caroldies your way? Perish the thought.
Hey, lady… let’s get this show on the road.
A Game Upon the Midnight Clear
It came upon a midnight clear,
That canine urge to go.
Whining and wiggling for all they’re worth,
To lead you into the cold.
Canine mirth, you’re out and then,
That puppy won’t do a thing.
You head back in to get some sleep,
Before that alarm does ring.
You’re back to sleep and then they come,
Cold noses end dream world.
And then on sleepy feet you float,
From bed you are uncurled.
Out again, they make no gains,
Back in the house you bring,
Your stubborn and insistent hounds,
Who still won’t do a thing.
To sleep again, you’re on the road,
When they say no, no, no.
You leash again, get on the way,
Your painful steps are slow.
You know it is beyond your powers,
To untangle from this string.
You trudge along a helpless toad,
As daylight begins to sing.
Want more caroldies? You’re obviously a glutton for punishment (or, more accurately, PUN-ishment). However, you’re obviously in charge of your own destiny, so… click at your own risk.
From my wagging fool to yours…
Walking in a Neutered Wonderland
Disclaimer: Tavish does not endorse, nor does he appreciate, the “humor” of this post.
I can’t even look at you right now, Ma.
I was recently reminded of a particular caroldy that I began in the comments over at Something Wagging a few years ago. It seems high time that we revisit that little gem and add a few more verses.
Walking in a Neutered Wonderland
Puppy balls, are you listening?
At the vet’s, the tools are glistening.
It’ll all be all right, but by later tonight,
You’ll be walking in a neutered wonderland.
Gone away, is your manhood.
Instead you see, you’ll be fixed good.
You might think it’s wrong, but just go along
Walking in a neutered wonderland.
To the dog park you can totally go, man,
And the fertile females will not frown.
Lots of fun you’ll have,
I know you still can.
Don’t let this operation get you down.
Treats aplenty, you’ll require.
As you recover, by the fire.
To face unafraid,
The different junk the vet made.
Walking in a neutered wonderland.
I totally get you’re down about this stuff, and
And now you think our evil has renown.
We didn’t ask your thoughts,
But give it time, man.
You’re still the king, just no jewels set in your crown.
Just wait and see, you’ll be thrilling.
Without your balls, you’ll be chilling.
You’ll frolic and play,
The same old sweet way,
Walking in a neutered wonderland.
So… that happened. Sorry, everyone. Feel free to caption this photo of Tavish as my holiday gift to you.
He sees you when you’re eating…
I hope you’ve been good* this year. Tavish Claus has been watching.
Tavish Claus in the house, y’all.
Tavish Claus is Coming to Town
You shouldn’t go out. You better not lie.
You better stay home. I’m telling you why.
Tavish Claus is coming to town.
He’s going to kiss. He’ll be licking you twice.
He’s gonna ask if his dinner you’ll dice.
Tavish Claus is coming to town.
He sees you when you’re eating.
He knows when you’ve got cake.
If you’re smart, you’ll share your food,
Or a giant mess he’ll make.
You shouldn’t hold out. His patience you’ll try.
He will refuse to go out, until he’s eaten your fries.
Tavish Claus is coming to town.
*In this context, being “good” means giving your dog lots of food. All the food. So much food. (Tavish Claus thinks with his stomach, obviously… I’m the one who has to think about his waistline. I totally get how Mrs. Claus must feel.)
Doggie style Christmas carols return!
This month, wordless Wednesdays will be extremely wordy… are you ready for the return of caroldies? They’re something of an annual tradition around these parts…
Make sure to leave out some cookies for Tavish… er, Santa
Bark! the Begging Canines Sing
“Bark!” The begging canines sing
“Glory to yummy dinner things.
We’ll take some of that turkey wild,
And crumbs from yonder messy child.”
Joyful the Dalmatians rise,
When more tidbits fall from the skies.
“It doesn’t matter who’s to blame,
We’ll eat that food ‘fore it can stain.”
Morsels, by every dog adored.
Your every move won’t be ignored.
At dinner time they quickly come,
Hoping that you will give them some.
Patiently they wait to see,
If you’ll indulge their begging plea.
Stealing food will also sell,
If your back is turned as well.
Bark the begging canines sing,
“Glory to the dinner bell’s ring!”
Now, it’s your turn. Share your caroldies in the comments or send me your requests for this year’s caroldy selections!
(While you’re at it, you might as well caption that Tavish as well, right?)