It’s been a year today since I said goodbye to my best gal. It’s hard to believe that a whole year has passed. How has it been that long since she was here?
When we were young…
I struggled to find the words for today’s post. Rather than force it, I’m going to go get some Tavish snuggles and reminisce about my Bella.
Missing that face today and every day.
The news lately has been pretty upsetting, infuriating, and depressing. (I’ll leave it to you to decide which bucket you put each story in. However, it seems to me that they all fit neatly – and horribly – into all three.) It’s tempting to bury yourself in cute animal videos, holiday shopping, and other distractions. I know I’ve been tempted.
However, while I was putting up my Christmas tree the other night, I happened to pop in the DVD of one of my favorite specials – ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas. Surprisingly, the animated tale of some mice breaking tradition and stirring on Christmas Eve inspired some deep thoughts. In particular, this song proved quite relevant to my state of mind:
Frankly put, sometimes the world kind of sucks. (I’ll leave the eloquence to this brilliant lady.) It can seem kind of hopeless and that it will never change.
I can’t believe that. I can’t let myself believe that. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people let the world happen to them and claim they have no agency in the situation. Obviously, sometimes terrible things happen that are out of our control. However, we can’t just sit around waiting for a miracle to fix our problems, whether personal or societal. After all, even a miracle needs a hand, right?
I mean, does your dog just sit in the kitchen hoping that food will magically fall to the floor? Okay, bad example. He probably does. BUT… he probably also considers counter surfing when he sees an opportunity to make his own gastronomical miracle happen. I prefer to keep an eye out for chances to give those needed miracles a boost, rather than waiting for them to just happen. I aspire to be a counter surfer for change… or something like that.
I’ll return to our regular scheduled goofiness with my next post… just felt the need to get this one out there. Can you think of any other lessons from holiday specials that we can take to heart during these times of trouble? Share in the comments!
This post is a part of the Caring for Critters Health Issues Round Robin hosted by Heart Like a Dog. As the adorable graphic suggests, pet bloggers will be sharing their personal experiences, health problems their pets have faced, and how we dealt with them. While we consulted veterinarians and specialists in determining our own course of treatment, we are not vets and nothing shared should be considered medical advice. Got it?
I’ll admit – I had trouble deciding what to write about today. My beautiful Bella had numerous health issues over the years, so choosing one was difficult. I also wasn’t necessarily motivated to revisit some of those issues in light of our recent loss. However, inspiration finally hit, and this post is the result. Continue reading
Riddle me this, dear reader… is there anything you would erase from your mind if you were given the option to forget something completely?
That’s right. I’m getting all Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind on you today. (Although, for the sake of this exercise, let’s assume that there are no odd side effects or shady corporate employees to consider.)
So, what would it be? The red pill or the blue one? If you choose to forget, what memory would you erase? It could be anything – a relationship that ended badly, the loss of someone important to you, or an embarrassing moment.
I spent a lot of time thinking about my answer to this question. Continue reading
I planned to sit down and write today’s post after dinner. (So far, my #NaBloPoMo has been defined by a failure to plan ahead.) However, while eating dinner, I heard the news about Robin Williams. He died today at the age of 63, due to an apparent suicide. As I sit down to write tonight’s post, I find myself unable to write about my originally planned topic. Continue reading
… or, in this case, your Bella.
I was thinking recently about all of the things – both little and not-so-little – that have changed around here since we lost Bella in May. Sometimes it seems like I’m surrounded by a thousand tiny reminders on any given day.
Loosely inspired by this song, here are twenty (out of countless) ways I miss my Bella:
How I miss that sweet and silly face…
Have you ever had one of those dreams that made you furiously happy and deeply sad at the same time?
This past weekend, I had one of those dreams. In it, I was cleaning my house. (Even in my dreams, I channel Monica Geller – at my house, you can eat cookies over the sink!) I opened the patio door to go into the backyard, and stepped out onto our deck. Suddenly, I saw movement out of the corner of my eye. I turned to see my beautiful Bella, the very picture of unbridled joy, her tongue hanging out as she raced towards me. I leaned down, just in time to catch her as she bounded into my arms.
Happy tails to you…
I awoke to the feeling of her wagging tail and of holding her tight. Bella was always a wonderfully enthusiastic welcoming committee, and i always felt so loved when I returned home. I woke up feeling that love all around me.
It was the perfect reunion, and I felt a powerful sense of peace and happiness, accompanied by the sadness of knowing that we can only meet in my dreams. However, if it gets me a few more precious minutes with Bella, I’ll welcome all the dreams that come my way.
Hello, my friends.
I know it’s been a while since I’ve written. I haven’t really felt all that much like blogging since I said goodbye to Bella. (Some days, I haven’t felt like doing much of anything.) However, please know that I read every single one of your comments on my last blog post. Your kind words touched my heart and meant a great deal to me during the past few weeks.
A smooch for a pooch.
I do plan to talk more about what we’ve been doing and how we’ve been adjusting here at Casa de I Still Want More Puppies. I want to give Bella a proper farewell on the blog as well, but I haven’t figured out what that means yet. How do I say goodbye? How do I celebrate her?
I was profoundly moved by the way that our friends at Kenzo the Hovawart and Will My Dog Hate Me said farewell to Viva and Frankie, respectively. I want to find an appropriate and meaningful way to say goodbye on this blog as well. I’m hoping that it will also help me as I navigate my way forward.
With that in mind, I’ll probably be playing it a bit by ear for a little while. I have some serious things on my mind (obviously), but I’m going to try to mix those in with regular blog posts, photos of Tavish (because his furry face is good for what ails me), and (if I can manage it) some humor. We’ll see how it goes as I ease back into this whole blogging thing. Stay tuned…
This post is one I can’t believe I have to write. Today, our family said goodbye to Bella. We kissed this sweet face farewell, and life will never be the same.
Goodnight, sweet pup.
We have been managing her kidney disease for over two years now, but – after a very difficult weekend – we had to face the reality that her condition had deteriorated rapidly in the past few days. It was time to let her go.
I don’t quite know what else to say. I find myself suffocated by her absence. Everywhere I look, I see where she is not. I’m not quite me without her.
